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13th September 2016  |  Career Management , Individuals

Failure. Disappointment. Rejection. Words such as these are often avoided at all costs.

As a Career Coach I see the negative impact rejection can have on an individual on a daily basis. Today’s job market is incredibly competitive and therefore it may take several rejections before landing a role that you’ll be content with. Be mindful that rejection will not feel good.

I’m not trying to look at it with rose-tinted glasses, but merely emphasising the positives that can eventuate from it. The key here is to respond to the rejection as positively as you can; take the interviewers feedback on board, appreciate what you’ve learned from the experience and ensure that each interview you attend that your performance improves each time (even if it’s just a smidgen!). After all, practice makes perfect, keeping in mind that for every interview you attend, it’s one interview closer to landing the role you want.


You can’t avoid rejection

But what I’ve learned over the course of my career is that being human – failure, disappointment and rejection are inevitable.

All three are going to happen in one form or another over the course of your lifetime and can have detrimental effects on one’s physical and mental well-being

It’s common that we find ourselves holding onto these failures, and start experiencing emotions such as anger, resentment and bitterness which slowly start to creep in.

More often than not, the way we handle our negative experiences can be extremely unhealthy, and as result in doing a lot more harm than good. It’s at this point, we should make the conscious decision to look at our past circumstances from a different perspective.

It’s easy for us to dwell over past negative areas of our lives. We can easily sit back and analyse career choices, our character, our ability to make sound decisions. However, after each and every negative experience, there is something to learn.

This is something I myself have been through, and had I not been subjected to failure, disappointment, and rejection, my level of self-learning would not be where it is at today.


But you can learn from it

  • Rejection can outline exactly what it is you want.
  • We are taught that through our mistakes, every human has flaws.
  • Mistakes can teach us, often ruthlessly, what works and what does not.
  • We can develop our learning to take responsibility.
  • Rejection, disappointment and making mistakes can improve our self-integrity.

So next time you feel yourself holding on to feelings of resentment and bitterness, try to appreciate how valuable negative experiences can be. Understand how they can build your character, improve your way of thinking, and act as a learning-curve for future decision-making.


Thinking positive



On a final note, positive thinking and its power should not be underestimated as this is the mindset that should be taken into every job interview.

It seems like such a simple choice, but depending on your circumstances it can be difficult to achieve. But consider this – the more you keep telling yourself you can’t do something the harder it tends to become to achieve that goal.


Because you start to believe it. So why can’t you reverse this effect? Set yourself realistic goals and keep telling yourself you CAN do it, and eventually, it will fall into place.


Matt Appassamy
Career Coach

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